Monday, March 25, 2013

Finally a post. Trying.

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It's been months that I've been stalking blogs, but haven't written. Life has been a whirl-wind. Many ups and some downs in between. We have been on vacation, celebrated holidays and birthdays, chopped about 9 inches off my hair, added highlights, drank too much, cried frequently, received promotions, helped E look for jobs and see him run a business at the same time. Yea, that about sums it all up. 

I haven't touched much on the next subject in the past due to keepin' it all in my own head and heart, but need to get thoughts on paper or eh...the internet. E and I have been married for 8 years (yay!) so we often get asked the dreaded question, "when are y'all going to have kids?" I typically don't mind the question because in the past I have always had the response, "when we are ready." You know the snarky response...gotta love it. Times have changed though. We have been trying the past few months. Of course, it still hasn't happened. My dear friends that are close to me say don't worry, it will happen when it happens. Just relax and enjoy the time. Does anyone else agree that's pretty much the impossible? I know people that "accidentally" conceive and those people may never understand the month to month challenges with trying. I am not an organized person, but I guess I am a super-duper planner and worrier when it comes to something that E and I both want. I have every app on the planet on my phone to calculate ovulation, I have searched Google so much I believe that myself or E might have every ailment listed on webMD's infertility sites, I email and ask pregnant people about their journey in hopes it might be similar to ours. It's absolutely crazy. I wish I could take a breath and relax, but right now I can't. Instead I just get myself all worked up and have two periods in one month...

It's called a journey for a reason, I guess?! I just hope it ends and begins with a new season and journey soon.

Cheers to a post even if it's a downer!




7 comments:

Jennifer said...

Love the quote - so true but so hard to swallow (most of the time).

Best of luck on your journey and just try to stay in the moment - it will happen when it should. :)

Jayne Wittschen said...

I was so happy to see you had a new post!! It had been a while! I'm so sorry you and Eric have had some rough months. :( All I can say (because I know people mean well, but always say the wrong things) is hugs to you and Eric and sending prayers your way. xo

Ashley Brickner said...

Just found your blog, your life may be different now ... but all the love & support your way. We tried for quite a while & it was emotionally draining, but then it happened at the exact right time. Hope things are going well for you!!

wordsaboutwaverly.blogspot.com

Laynah said...

The first few months of negative pregnancy tests are SO hard, but honestly, I got used to it for a while. I wouldn't wish this on you, but I just came up on my year mark of trying and made an appointment with an infertility specialist. Good luck and baby dust to us both!

PS - I HATE when people say "when you relax it will happen" haha! That's gotta be the worst one because it almost puts blame on you.

Laynah said...

PS I'm a curly headed girl too and chopped about the same amount of hair off a few months ago - curls are so much bouncier!

You should show us a picture next time :)

Janna Renee said...

I have multiple friends that were and are trying to get pregnant while our 'accident' happened, and I apologized to each of them. I know I didn't have to and some people might find that strange, but I needed them to know that I recognize their struggle and support them in their journey. I do think that waiting for nature to take it's course was a surefire way for us to get pregnant, but who knows if that works for everyone. I will tell you that my friend Johanna says she got pregnant the day everything aligned and she laid in bed for 45 minutes after doing the 'deed', so try that? Haha.

Courtney B said...

It's impossible to relax and let it happen when it's supposed to happen... when you're finally ready for it to happen! Your feelings of wanting this and anxiety over it happening are very real and don't try to push them back and forget about them until you erupt. If I'm allowed to give you any advice- don't be afraid to go talk to a doctor! If you've been trying for months and have no results, it may give you piece of mind to talk to a doctor and get advice, or get tested, or whatever the doctor thinks could help!
Praying for you and your husband!!