Finally a post. Trying.

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It's been months that I've been stalking blogs, but haven't written. Life has been a whirl-wind. Many ups and some downs in between. We have been on vacation, celebrated holidays and birthdays, chopped about 9 inches off my hair, added highlights, drank too much, cried frequently, received promotions, helped E look for jobs and see him run a business at the same time. Yea, that about sums it all up. 

I haven't touched much on the next subject in the past due to keepin' it all in my own head and heart, but need to get thoughts on paper or eh...the internet. E and I have been married for 8 years (yay!) so we often get asked the dreaded question, "when are y'all going to have kids?" I typically don't mind the question because in the past I have always had the response, "when we are ready." You know the snarky response...gotta love it. Times have changed though. We have been trying the past few months. Of course, it still hasn't happened. My dear friends that are close to me say don't worry, it will happen when it happens. Just relax and enjoy the time. Does anyone else agree that's pretty much the impossible? I know people that "accidentally" conceive and those people may never understand the month to month challenges with trying. I am not an organized person, but I guess I am a super-duper planner and worrier when it comes to something that E and I both want. I have every app on the planet on my phone to calculate ovulation, I have searched Google so much I believe that myself or E might have every ailment listed on webMD's infertility sites, I email and ask pregnant people about their journey in hopes it might be similar to ours. It's absolutely crazy. I wish I could take a breath and relax, but right now I can't. Instead I just get myself all worked up and have two periods in one month...

It's called a journey for a reason, I guess?! I just hope it ends and begins with a new season and journey soon.

Cheers to a post even if it's a downer!

Marley for Prez.

The election is over...thank Heavens! Perhaps, I can go on Facebook without getting angry. Scratch that...I just did - bad idea. Just one comment - Are we in 2012? Do people really think it's black vs white? 

Marley for President. 

Moving right along...

My Mom has had a tumor on her face\neck\jaw for a very long time. We thought she had it removed a few years ago, but it grew back. Now we know, it probably was not fully removed years ago and I want her to sue the doctor, but I am mean and my Mom is nice. Long story short, she had surgery on Monday. I balled like a baby on Sunday when she told me we actually didn't know if it was malignant or benign. Sunday night and Monday were pretty much the most anxious I have been in a very long time...so much so I had a terrible migraine. Good news is...

All I have to say is the original doctor is very lucky because I might hire a lawyer myself if the outcome was different.
Because of this surgery, my parents had to cancel a trip to Chicago. I didn't even really think about E and I taking the trip instead because you know we don't have two HUGE trips coming in December or anything. But we aren't talking about that. I asked E to see about free plane tickets. Scored those. Received a discount code from a friend for a hotel. Scored that. So, we are going to Chi-town. I am over the moon excited! 

Lists anyone?

We are going to eat at some fabulous restaurants, walk the Magnificent Mile, visit Millennium Park, see Wrigley Field, Navy Pier and lastly, see the Texans whoop the Bears on Sunday! Anything else I need to add to the list? Favorite restaurants? Hot dogs? Pizza? It's going to be cold and that just makes me elated.

The next two months are so busy and I am forever grateful for that especially since Mama bear is cancer free. 

Those emails.

A few months back E and I had some pretty substantial revelations with each other and it's been a learning and changing curve ever since those days. My marriage is everything to me and to make it better is one helluva a job that takes more than one person. I am forever grateful I am married to someone that changes with me, loves and adores me all of the days of our lives even when I don't deserve it. 
I have built up anger and resentment for whatever I am not sure? It's one of those things we all deny over and over, we blame everyone else around us because we SWEAR it's their fault we are miserable, but in the end really its our own fault. We cannot control others nor can they control us. I signed up for emails from a lovely website : Tiny Buddha (No I am not Buddhist, yes I believe wholeheartedly in Christ, no I do not worship a statue, yes I believe in self-help and amazing words that will change my life.) They send daily emails to overcome life. They send emails to better yourself. Their emails either ring true to oneself or they don't do much because you may have never experienced the discussion in the email. Today, rang true! I read it twice and sent it to E to read. It was about anger, overcoming your feelings for the people around you. 

The power does not lie without. The power lies within you. You just have to know that you deserve it—happiness, peace, love, and joy. ~ Nanette Stein

We are the ones with the power to overcome. We are the ones with the power to choose happiness, peace, love and joy. To some that might not mean a thing, but to me it means everything.

“If you correct your mind, the rest of your life will fall into place.” ~Lao Tzu

7 years and counting.

7 years ago I married my best friend. 

We wed at a Southern Baptist Church in the late evening. Our colors were pale pink and green with hints of ivory. My girls wore long dresses, the groomsmen wore tails, our moms wore long gowns and our dads matched the groomsmen. The church was filled with tons of people. Flowers adorned the pews as well as the floor we stood to recite our vows. I remember walking into the room prior to the trumpet playing and one of E's best friends saying, "wow- you look beautiful." I remember- my dad asking me if I was okay. I remember moving my vail from the back to the front to cover my face. I was almost an emotional basket case. The doors opened and the trumpet began to play. I think I walked too fast, but my dad remembers walking slow. I just thought- get me to the end of this long aisle. I couldn't focus on anyone because I didn't want to cry my eyes out. When we reached the alter, my dad uncovered my face by moving my veil. We had a family prayer and the wedding ceremony began. Our vows were the typical vows, but the message our pastor gave was one that so many had never heard. Still to this day, people say to my mom they remember his words so much and how it was an intimate ceremony that filled the church with love. 

That's how I feel about E. My heart abounds and is full of love for my best friend like no other. 

Happy Anniversary, Eric!

Be Mine.

We started Valentine's on Saturday with massages and a little din-din and will continue our celebration of love this evening! 
I handcrafted some items for E in which I gave him this morning and he loved them! He cooked me breakfast while I sat on the floor putting my makeup on, what a little cupid?! 

On the menu for dinner:

Raw oysters (His piece)

A little pasta dish with a variety of cheeses

Filet Oscar with Asparagus and a Bearnaise sauce

Fluffernutter cupcakes

Of course, red wine and maybe some white too! 

I am really excited to get off work and begin cooking our feast! Hopefully, everyone feels loved today!

Love Story Link Up.

I love love as well as a good love story! In celebration of pink and red day, I wanted to share mine and E's story.

1. How long have you and your significant other been together?

E and I dated all through college and married a year or so after I graduated. We have been together a total of 11 years!!! Married for 7 this April! Unbelievable how time literally just flies.

2. How did you meet? {What's your "love" story?}

My best friend invited me to go on a cruise for our first college Spring Break and of course I obliged. Come to find out the cruise was a little girls' cheer leading cruise...IE: little kiddos everywhere. L and I were desperate to talk to other people other than each other and that's when a UT hat, a group of guys and a pool come into the picture. We saw a group of guys and noticed one had a University of Texas hat on, so we figured they lived near us. We just busted through the crowd, asked him to take our picture and we all became a little party group the rest of the trip. It was an absolute blast! I met E later that night and he basically needed help getting some random girl away from him and since his baby blues made me fall in love, I quickly danced and drank with him the rest of the time. I came home told my parents that I met the man I would marry. :)

3. If married, how long have you been married? If not, is this the guy you hope to marry? {do tell} 7 years!

4. If you are married, where did you get married at? Big or small wedding?  If not, where would you like to get married? And will it be big or small?

We wed in Houston, Texas at Second Baptist. We had a pretty decent size wedding...nothing too huge, but definitely not small. There is not one thing I would change about our big day: I loved every minute! 

5. Do you have any nick-names that you call one another? Do share!

I call him E. He calls be Baby, Julie, Julez.

6. Name 3 things you love most about your honey.

His laugh, his loyalty and his heart. He has the biggest heart and seriously adores me!

7. Tell us how he proposed? Or your ideal proposal?

He proposed to me on our boat on Lake Austin with wine, food, a rose and the most brilliant round diamond! It was a perfect proposal that was very private...I will always remember that night!

8. Is he a flowers and teddy bear kind of guy for v-day, or strawberries, champagne, and rose petals?

He is definitely not a teddy bear guy, but he definitely is a romantic at heart! I will always remember I said something about "really, candles..." in college and I think that ruined his want to make every occasion romantic. We love to fix dinner together, drink wine, watch sports with a fire. He does surprise me with flowers on occasion! 

9. Are you a sunset dinner on the beach kind of girl, or pop a movie in and relax on the couch?

If we lived somewhere that had a beach and beautiful sunset everyday, we would TOTALLY be the dinner and beach couple. There is nothing more we both love than salt water, a drink and a sunset! 

10. Tell us one thing you'd like to do with your significant one day. If you could do anything? Go anywhere?

I would love to go to Italy with E. We both have been, but not together! He is an Italian kiddo that loves food and wine as do I, so I think it would be the perfect place.

11. Tell us what you plan on doing on this Valentine's Day.

I am not sure what we are going to do yet...I am bummed it's on a Tuesday this year. Whatever we do, we will have a blast and probably spend too much money even if we cook at home. ;)

12. Are you asking for anything this Valentine's day?

I never ask for much on Valentine's, BUT this year I did ask for Kendra Scott earrings. If I don't get those, I will be totally fine with some pretty flowers from Randall's.

13. Give us one piece of advice of keeping a relationship strong and full of love.

Be with your best friend, learn to compromise, always say I love you and remember to say you are sorry. 

14.  Show us a picture of what love means to you.

Being together, being ourselves, laughing and having a blast!

Do you kiss good night?

On Saturday, I was sitting at one of my dear friend's houses waiting to see the finished nursery, chatting with the girls with no TV and at some points no noise. We sat and chatted about this person and that person, about babies, about the opinion of people that already have babies and lastly about men. We went on and on about marriage and how it's hard to date when single at the age of 32 (not moi, obvs) because men go for the younger crowds. I began to think how blessed I am for having found my love at such a young, resilient age. We have been together for 11 years and I am only 30 years old...that's a long time. I said to K & P, "E is my boy, my boo, my best friend. There is no one like him and I never want to be away from him." 

We are two very different people. Our love language is so very different. We learn about each other every single day. We cuddle every single Saturday and Sunday morning. We fall asleep on the couch together every single night. I tell him everything (so no one can really expect me to keep a secret) and he tells me everything. I shop for him. I make his lunch every morning and his breakfast most days. He makes my coffee every morning. We yell at each other and I say hateful things sometimes. He will run my bath water when I ask him. He gets so pissed at me for being on Facebook and Pinterest at night (what's a girl to do?). I have pet peeves about him and he has the same about me...chewing too loudly...that will get us both angry. We are partners in crime. We are travel buddies. The kid hasn't done laundry in 11 years, but I haven't cleaned out the garage in 6 years. He does the outdoor chores and I do the indoor chores, but we both like to make the yard pretty. He is my other half, my soul mate. 

We don't have a perfect marriage, far from it actually, but we kiss each other good night every night; I am reminded of his love for me before I dream.

Ghetto.

We knew they were coming into town about a month ago, but we didn't buy tickets just for the fact that we didn't know if we could make the show. Friday night, I asked E if he wanted to see them on Saturday...it would be $100. 

It didn't take him long to say, "let's do it."

We saw a little ghetto-fab:

Wu Tang Clan

See- me being from Houston I love some ghetto rap music and E being from Philly really, really loves the Wu so it was a match made in Heaven. One of the very first gifts I bought E 11 years ago were tickets to see the Wu, so of course I was all game for a Saturday night date with my E listening to one of his favorite groups.

The crowd was weird. Last time, they played at an outside venue and let's just say...it was filled to the brim with ghetto-ness. This show was inside at Emo's and was filled with Emo kids, wtf? I wanted a bit more ghetto, but Emo kids that smelt, were wasted and jumping up and down filled the arena.

All 9 of the Clan were there and they did not disappoint!!! 

Spreading CrysTAL all over the crowd, sweating profusely and throwing their towels, taking off clothes and throwing shirts, rapping to the beat randomly, smoking blunts openly and seriously all of them smiling from ear to ear with the pleasure of being in Austin entertaining a crowd was Priceless.

Saying the wrong thing.

I say the wrong thing a lot...I am not sure why I do it, but I have to finally admit that. I say things that come out the wrong way and it's always the wrong time. I blurt things out that I don't even think about and know it's going to hurt my husband. Why, oh why do I do it? I don't like to be wrong. I am always right in my book, so when I am confronted about a decision or questioned I immediately become defensive. I tend to be too independent and not lean on E for guidance. I feel that I need to be independent because who wants to be dependent on someone forever and who wants to have someone else make all the decisions? Not this girl. I need to find balance though. I need to understand that we don't all have picture perfect days and that in a marriage not both parties are going to be happy at the same time as the other. If one has a bad day, is tired, fussy and down right full of an attitude, it's okay. That will pass and the next day is a new day. I tend to be smiley and happy and then when my partner in crime isn't that way I feel that the happiness is sucked out of me, but in reality it's not...it's just that we are in completely different moods. That's totally okay. I know this because I PMS really bad every month and E continues to smile and be happy. I know that there are times when we each will be happy when we hang out with friends, are at work, driving, playing golf, shopping because we have new stuff to talk about and new scenery with friends. Nothing is wrong with bad moods, happy moods, yelling, crying and smiling all at different times. I adore E and he makes me the happiest lady on the block 9 times out of 10. He is my everything and I need to remember that, be grateful for it and learn to shut my mouth because I want to stop staying the wrong things.

Birthday Boy.

Happy Birthday to the love of my life...

To my very best friend who is always there for me...

To the most loyal, endearing, whole-hearted person I know...

To my husband that I love oh so much. Happy Birthday, sweet E!